No Pep in His Step created by Lightning24 11 years ago

FYI, I had this song lying around for a while and figured I should use it to talk to you guys.

Well, this should have been out there a while ago. First, I'd like to apologize for all of my fans for not commenting and listening to your music for the past month or so. You have every reason to un-fan me, I'm a little surprised you haven't yet.

To most of you, I must have magically dissapered from the site sometime around xmas. Its time to explain why. I was gearing up for my next big album, Bystander. A solo album that was going to capitalize on my big increase in talent I was experiencing. Except something happened. I was listening through Undertones, and it struck me. I loved my old music MUCH more. Something bugged me about my new music. It wasn't jazzy enough. It had too much Latin and other stuff in it, and the problem was I didn't have a choice. I have always been known as a jazz and latin guy on here, and everybody knows that there is a very, lets say, finite amount of jazz and latin loops on here. And it happened. I had no ideas.

I don't think I've ever told someone on here, but the creative process it takes for me to make a song is really trial and error. I usually get the urge to write a song, have several attempts(all of them bad) and get off the site in frustration. I come back later and somehow, some way, I pump out a masterful track. Its been that way ever since the beginning(you should hear some of my duds from last year. Eesh, they were bad). I was experiencing one of those times around Xmas as I was working on my new album, and day after day I expected to find that one day that would bring a great track. That day never came. I tried and tried in vain to produce a good song, and it never happened. Being a highly critical person about myself in general IRL, I couldn't bear to keep those songs. After being overly frustrated with myself, as well as the mounting pressure of midterms in school, I found myself stop logging on every day after school. I found myself not listening to your music. And I'm very sorry about that.

All this is compounded in the fact that my music was getting so good. I had reached the pinnacle of my career. 50+ fans, 50+ songs(one inside the top 25), and all you guys telling me how great I was. To be frank, I felt(and still feel to some extent) burned out.

I've almost been going through a period of self-searching. I found Sound Cloud, a great website with some of the most diverse music on the internet. I started covering music for my school online magazine, and I became introduced to some amazing music that has changed my perspective on the genre of jazz in general. Gramatik was one of those people, who's tracks showed a blend of hip-hop, funk, soul, jazz, and dubstep(I reccomend to check him out, btw). I want to be like Gramatik, a "genre bastardizer", someone who doesn't regard genre and just makes good music. I started making some hip hop beats, and realized I'm pretty damn good at it.

The point of this entire post is I really don't know where I'm going. Part of me wants to try out some of my new ideas, part of me is too scared to. Part of me wants to venture out of my shell of jazz and latin, the other part is highly critical of that. One part of me is confident of my musical ability, the other thinks I'm crap.

I really need your help guys. Please let me know how I should proceed, how to venture on. You guys might see a totally new me on here with my next album(you probably will actually), something that reminds you of the old me, or not be on here at all. Please help me through this dark time in my MS career.

Thanks with bearing with me,
~Lightning